Her

A few days ago something someone said in passing piqued my curiosity. It was only a word and I have no idea why it caught my attention the way it did. Maybe it was the way it was said as the man walked by and out the door. The word spoken was said as if he was talking to someone, but he was alone, walking briskly and it looked as if he had just said it into the air. The word was “Her.” 

In the moment it was hilarious and unexplainable. There was no logical reason for why he said it, and there was nobody close to him who he was saying it to. After my giggling subsided I found that I couldn't stop thinking about “Her.”

The moment I heard him say it the first thing that popped into my mind was the movie “Her.” Personally I never had a desire to go see it when it was in theaters what feels like an eternity ago. I was in no hurry to see “Her”...ever. But throughout this journey, I have found that it's in the most ridiculous and unexplainable moments if I am willing to stop and let that moment in that I have had my greatest revelations and most divine discoveries! 

I know I have probably spent my life dismissing such moments and events. They usually happen so quickly that to be honest, its easy to forget something that barely even has a chance to register. I was usually off and running to the next whatever I was going to do. 

Getting caught up in the moment is the only place where real life exists. Stopping in my tracks is something I have learned how to do. I don't want to miss whatever may be wrapped in the moments called inconvenience and unexpected. This was one of those moments. 

As I was driving home I decided that I was going to find the movie “Her” and watch it. I wanted to write when I got home and on top of it I was feeling quite drained from my day, but I felt like if I just went on about my business I could miss something that was awaiting my arrival. That might seem silly to pretty much everyone on the face of this planet, but I have had too many experiences in this way that have changed the way I see and experience life to dismiss it.

I couldn't believe that I was going to spend my evening watching a movie that I planned to never see. I went into watching this movie with the understanding that it was about some guy who falls in love with his phone. I had no idea what I was in store for.

I was surprised at how quickly it captured my attention. Weirdly, I saw many parallels to my own life...just a little differently. It wasn't at all what I thought it was going to be, and I was even so moved in parts of it that I wept! I was shocked.
There were a few “racy” scenes that I actually closed my eyes for because I was embarrassed. One of the scenes nearly right in the beginning made it clear that closing my eyes was not enough...I could still hear what was happening! I am amazed at how different I am. 

Nothing used to phase me, and now I feel so connected to everything and everyone that I am very selective with what I watch and listen to. That may also sound silly, but I have experienced a life filled with the low level numbness of disconnection from myself and everyone else. I know what it was like feeling totally lonely and alone while in the middle of the crowds of people that used to be in my life. When I was doing something fun or with people everything felt OK in that moment, but when I wasn't always doing something I felt totally isolated even when there were people all around me.

It wasn't really until I began reflecting over my life that I realized I don't do or watch certain things anymore. I finally understood that whatever I put in eventually comes out in one form or another. I was able to see the direct connection to the power I have over the way I feel and my mood based on the things I see, think about and do. 

I love movies don't get me wrong, but being cluttered with the noise of life whether it's in movies, tv, reality shows, internet videos, cell phones or my former technology addiction it was impossible for me to stop everything that was running inside my head. I was totally addicted to the things that were keeping me from being able to experience life.

I used to be a huge scary movie freak...the scarier the better. Not anymore. The more in tune I became with myself and my spirit I started becoming highly sensitive to things that were sapping the life from me rather than inspiring it. I continued doing things I had always done until I felt abrupt shifts in my life when I had just been experiencing heaven in the middle of hell. When I did whatever it was anyway I immediately felt the reality of the inescapable hell my life really was.

I had finally began experiencing what it is like to have an even flow of joy and healing divine energy. When I did some of the same things I had been doing for years and years, I found that everything felt off. Feeling the differences has changed the way I choose, and adjusting my choices has changed my entire life!

So I almost turned the movie off because I didn't want to see or hear any of what was going on. Instead, I decided to fast forward through those parts. I'm glad I did because overall the movie surprised me. It reminded me of how I feel sometimes loving God so much and knowing that he is always with me, but would give anything sometimes just to be able to crawl up into his lap, lay my head on his chest with his arms wrapped around me and hear the beating of his heart. Instead, I put my hand on my heart and know that feeling my heart beat is to feel His!

So much of my life is lived in relationship with Jesus, my Heavenly Father and their precious Holy Spirit just like the movie depicted the man played by Joaquin Phoenix. He was having an all enveloping love affair with an operating system named Samantha. The difference is that I know the love of my entire existence will never go away and is experiencing life with me in all of the things I do, and we do together!

I understood the agony in the emotions he was experiencing as well as the elation that lifts you so high that your feet never touch the ground! Then I thought for a minute just how it would be possible for what is “formless” to communicate and experience true relationship with us. In the movie, Samantha being an operating system, was only able to communicate and “see” through the camera of his phone. Though she was not in a body, he was experiencing life with her in all of the things they did together. 

The heart connection pierces deep into our feelings and emotions beyond all that can be seen. It transcends logic and though seemingly intangible the tangible experiences are captured and stored in the cellular memory throughout the body. That makes it possible to access the feelings and emotions again and again whether good or bad, wanted or not. We draw the intangible into our reality one thought and feeling at a time!

It was beautiful to be able to have a visual of their relationship because it reminds me of what I experience every moment of every day with the Lord God who made me and created me to be this woman that I continue becoming...to live this with Him and for Him! I kept thinking what I would have missed if I had never seen that movie, and how differently everything could have been if I would never have given another thought to someone saying something as common as “Her.” 

I could have just come home, started writing as I had planned, went to sleep, and I never would have known the indescribable joy of the unexpected in quite this way. I was so thankful and still am for the moments where the nearly unnoticeable and seemingly insignificant become the doorways that open and take us to places in directions that we probably never would have gone on our own.

The saying “take time to stop and smell the roses” is totally true...because just as with the rose, the beauty it holds, and its intoxicating fragrance...you can't speed along and enjoy the fullness of all the rose is at the same time. Magical things happen when you allow yourself to get stopped in your tracks...I recommend doing it as much as possible :)